Taking Its Toll

Okay…I give up…doing all this major stuff (you know house selling and buying and baby making WHILE going through the most busy part of my job) was a bad idea. There I said it.

So why do I feel like everything if collapsing around me? (Okay that’s a tad over-dramatic…but that’s how it feels!)

Now I’m sure things aren’t nearly as dire as that statement makes them sound. In fact things in general are going well. The sale of our condo and the purchase of our house are both going along well…I think we’ll have a mortgage early next week and it looks like finally the buyers of our condo are done trying to deal. So if things continue to go the way they have been we should be able to set a closing date sometime next week for both properties.

With the 2nd IVF cycle…well I guess you could say that we’re in limbo. We’re waiting…and waiting…and waiting…for it to be Tuesday. (Pregnancy test day!)

I’ve been amazingly cranky today. Just in a really foul mood. But there wasn’t much to do, as I was in a holding pattern waiting on a bunch of different people to get back to me on various things. And some of those people got back to me shortly after lunch so things picked up this afternoon.

About 3 today my co worker was cooing over something and talking in baby talk, while NewsBoy and I were discussing something and I was trying to get something done. Well I lost it. I had to practically run out of the room. I got to the stairwell I hide in when I need to hide without anyone seeing I was crying.

(And for the record…when I’m experiencing any extreme emotion…happy…sad… angry… overwhelmed…I cry. It’s just the way I let it out best.)

After a few minutes I took a deep breath to try and calm myself down. I was very busy and really couldn’t be away from my desk that long. And I was able to calm myself down and get to the bathroom to clean myself up. I gotta admit…feeling a bit better now that I’ve let some of it out. And in retrospect I do realize that is what this was…the need to release the stress of the week. Honestly I don’t think I’m done crying. I know as soon as I see NewsBoy tonight the waterworks will start all over again.

But we just ended our day so I’m leaving. Here’s to a relaxing weekend!


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